Trash

I feel like TRASH!!! uhhh!!!! This is the worst year ever!!! It was so long since I have last posted and here I am again in my usual depressed and totally wasted self. Huh!!!!! Life sucks... Once you had everything and you wake up one day like nobody. Why is this really happening? And it is so hard to define myself. I'm not even sure if I really know myself. So long to the things I once owned and to theings I took for granted. I really suck! I can't even handle a simple responsibility. What more in the future? I'm not saying that I will still have greater positions but in the looks of it everything is possible!

Back to School

Uhh... School's about to come again... I mean tomorrow school is about to start, my life here as a normal person is officially over. I am once again the stressed looking freak... huhu... I'm so tired... school again.. I don't want to... Oh well, things are really ok lately, I mean in my social life. All friends are treated ok by me. Before I was ok with the work and friends are the problem but now... Arrgghh... Can't understand why life can't be not annoying for just a day... This really kills me. I don't even think that I'm prepared for school. This is so hard. Well, this won't even help me a bit and might worsen my day tommorow because I am late and I lack sleep. UHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy

It's already semestral break and I'm doing fine. I mean I'm sure that when school kicks back in I'm totally gonna die again. In this week I only watch series like "Grey's Anatomy" and "Bones" without even bothering that much about homework and articles, no hurting phone calls and a lot of crying. I cry a lot, tears are just curses. I admit that I miss crying at times but when I actually miss it, it hits me everyday then stops for a long time. It's not worth crying about stupid and useless things but I just can't help it. I can't fake myself and act as if I'm not affected or anything. I worry about my articles and still is happy. I am not speaking with a person that I usually speak to but still I'm happy. The word "HAPPY" here is very shallow. I mean I don't cry, I don't get too paranoid and I can sleep well at night, that is happy for me. Haha. Odd that I am happy when I'm with an argue with a someone. I admit that I was super affected and cried my head off for about 2 times but maybe this is a realization that there are things which aren't worth it. Actually I'm still not sure yet if I'm really happy but for now I think I am.